I may have already posted my new year’s resolution, but I’m about to let loose some steam seeing as the year is not over. I’ve been trying to be positive today and debated doing this, but it’s fair to show you that I am not always one well-balanced role model. Somehow I awoke the most cranky as I’ve ever been (or senile, seeing that I’m retiring to bed early like an 80-year-old) with no release really (Kristan may understand).

• I want to purge my crap, take it away and never let me see it again. Instead, I’m packing some of it with me to New York.
• Hitting head on table about planning 2010, as working = limited free time. There is a tear down my face because that means still no international trip this year. Let’s gamble 2011!
• Really sometimes you are an a$$hole. But I’m cranky, so I’m probably one too. The good news is the lying in the summer doesn’t even bother me anymore, and I can’t remember a better day than the last one we had. Props for moving somewhere that isn’t down.
• I wonder why you say these things. I am a numb, cold person, which is quite lame. And everytime I’m wondering how I’m supposed to respond, looks like you were just kidding. So I keep my mouth shut. I guess we’ll never know.
• Sometimes I’m afraid New York isn’t as great as everyone tells me that I should be loving it (apparently it is my life dream?). No no people, I’m just as confused as ever, just finding myself in a new city.
• Why can’t I really be Pocahontas a la Disney? To paint with all the colors of the wind, I promise I will paint you, dear readers, one fanfreakingtastic rainbow.

Last day to purge my soul, no need to understand just throw out that negative energy.